You Never Know

On Jan 5th we woke up to some pretty scary news. 6 police officers had been shot in Ogden. One had passed away and the other 5 were in critical condition. The officer that had been killed and 3 others were all Ogden City Police Officers. For the first half of last year, Skip was an Ogden City Police Officer.

For the past 5 years our family goal had been for Skip to finish school-majoring in criminal justice, and to get a job as a police officer. He tested and interviewed with a couple different departments over the past couple years. And last Valentines Day our prayers and goals were answered when Skip was hired by the Ogden City Police Dept. We felt as though it was time for us to really start our lives, now that Skip had a job in his chosen career. We could find a house and really put down some roots, instead of temporary living in one place or another. So Skip went through the Police academy- loving it and everything he was learning. Graduation came and we were all so excited about our new lives as a police family. And for the first time in our married life we had health benefits! Skip started his FTO (field training) and some of the excitement started to die down. Then things got really stressful and not at all what Skip thought it would be like. Over 3 weeks Skip lost 20 pounds due to the stress of the job. And if you know Skip- there is not 20extra pounds to be lost! Skip made the very hard decision to resign from the police department, realizing that the life of a cop was not for him. yes I was a bratty wife and fought him on it a little bit- telling him that he just needed to finish his training and get into the swing of things. He told me that he had gotten a Priesthood Blessing from his Uncle Dan and that resigning was the right thing to do. I said Ok.

Things have not been easy to say the least since that decision was made. Skip was able to find a job working for Wal Mart in Loss Prevention, but it doesn't pay much starting out. I was able to help out with a couple of big cupcake orders, but had to go back to work to help bring home the bacon. I found a job working nights- 11pm to 7am. So we have not had to put the kids in daycare- my number 1 rule for having to go back to work. Most days I only get about 4 hours of sleep (time by the way does NOT fly by when you have 20 hour days) and Skip and I hardly ever get to see each other. Needless to say I have felt some resentment towards my dear husband for putting us in this situation and me having to work nights(lack of sleep makes the world a little dim). But on Thurs morning everything was thrown into perspective for me. Of course we talked about the what if's...and of course I broke down and cried like a baby several times through out the day. Yes life is tough right now. Yes most days we are living paycheck to paycheck, and top roman or panda noodles like the kids call it- are our staple...but I don't have to worry everyday when my husband walks out the door to work- if he is going to come back home. I don't have to worry that some crazy with a gun is going to ruin our lives. I am thankful for the chance that Skip had to try out his dream job. I am even more thankful that it didn't fit. My heart goes out to the poor families of the police officers that were shot. That poor woman and her children that are now husband and fatherless. I couldn't do it.

I come to realize more and more that following the plan that Heavenly Father has for us is important. What if Skip hadn't followed the promptings to resign...what if Skip had listened to his wife and kept at it for a couple years...what if...

Right now- being poor and exhausted 90% of the time doesn't seem like that big a deal, cause I still have my husband safe and sound.